#73 Beaver Banter

Episode 73

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J&Z talk about if z worked at Chippendales, if bees have knees, sexy talk, and top 5 cock tails.
uh 73 it’s recording by the way you fill me up like the drugs do
how sticky is this sticky sticky is there honey on the [ __ ] desk
honey welcome back slap dicks this is around
the launch table are you okay that’s scary a little bit loud well yeah you’re okay i turned down the mics hey
ollie can you turn on the mic you knew an intro was coming where’s my snare um welcome back slap this is around the
launch table episode 73 i think it’s 73 right yes i think so i believe so uh
actually i just looked and i didn’t even well uh first and foremost as always ladies
and gentlemen we’re gonna start off with our sponsors yes aputure oceans bringing ideas and ads to life
also live stallion never be tamed why do you it’s not a [ __ ] cat it’s like i
just live stallion and you hiss it’s more like a horse like maybe like a like a big gust of
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easy and last plug before we get on to whatever the [ __ ] we’re going to talk about today uh patreon check out
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um episodes early ish and all that jazz and you know what if you’re a regular
listener you just get to support two of your favorite guys so um yeah so thank you summer collection summer collection
is out uh we’re gonna get some pictures and some [ __ ] get it all promoted we haven’t really promoted it on social media yet but we are going to i’m gonna
get the girls in it and [ __ ] and strut our stuff so i’m excited i know z is too
um yeah that is uh that is [ __ ] patreon and you know i don’t think there is any
experience or feeling like the feeling of paying for something that’s free
so subscribe to patreon thank you appreciate it well now you know this is free that we do so you know yeah exactly we take our
time and do everything like that so yeah you know this is like honestly we deserve more than that but you know yeah yeah
i mean we’re not sitting here begging but it’s more like a glass of wine for your brain after the end of this yeah you know it’s it’s heaven through the
earbuds that’s what it is and you know what we’re just giving you a little slice of it um yeah yeah so uh first thing i wanted to ask you see we we
slightly brought this up we were watching jersey jersey shore actually i wanted to ask you something really quick just this is really quick oh sorry am i
interrupting you no no okay yeah go ahead okay do i have the floor yeah i guess
what is the i try not to be confrontational
um why do you say like you have like things to talk about
because usually we just kind of wing it but usually we have like things but you’ll never share it and you’re like dude no i just wanted to be wrong
reaction like well maybe it could be better if we both had had the idea and we can approach it because it’s very unscripted it’s kind of to be honest
today i didn’t have something this is just something that i was thinking about you said in there yeah oh i have a couple things i’m like okay okay tell me what they are well because then it’s not
like raw because then it is raw it’s [ __ ] wrong it is [ __ ] raw no
because i want your initial reaction this is what it is so you get to prepare i don’t you always have things you want to ask
me you don’t tell me yes i do the only things that i don’t tell you are like if they’re like questions
yeah mine is a question i’m asking you a question i said i have a question to ask you okay what is it so
that’s the raw thing um so we were watching jersey shore okay
come give dean dean a hug um hello that was really loud in the mic
i’m sure sorry it’s fine i turned mine down yeah we actually our audio engineer behind is just [ __ ] yeah he’s hitting
it he’s doing good um so no so on [ __ ] jersey shore we got vinnie right so he ends up working at chippendales
okay so say you you how you this isn’t raw because you’ve asked
me this i know i said we’ve already talked about it so why couldn’t you ask me in there because this is proof i just
thought of it proof you you just said it oh it’s not right you’ve already asked those questions so it’s not gonna be wrong either way yeah
anyways this is not the one that i was thinking about this just came to me okay oh god okay okay okay so if you work at
chippendales okay you know how vinnie had his mom come out and you know she was crying because how beautiful it was
or whatever the [ __ ] which to be honest if my kid’s a stripper i’m not gonna make that show
but anyways definitely what not so you’re [ __ ] working at chippendales right okay so
you know the whole crew wants to [ __ ] see you right are you letting me come you already know the answer to that no
why not i i want a reason why not i’m just supporting you like i said before we you asked miss and i gave you a
reason and guess what i’ll answer it again and it’s a simple answer you will hang it over my head the rest of my life jerry i don’t want a hand i
don’t want to i would rather not just not do anything that you can hold over my head
just just don’t have to think about it hold it over your head and tails are the most accomplishments it doesn’t matter shut
up for the rest of my life it doesn’t matter in any argument or i made money every time and you’d wait until we’re in a group setting oh and then you’d say it
too embarrassed but just be like oh you can’t come back from that and i would rather different embarrassment that’s an accomplishment
no you know how many things i’ve i have you’ve made fun before that aren’t really an embarrassment but you’d like to say it in front of other people try
to embarrass me okay i gotcha and to be honest i don’t per se it’s maybe not but at the same
time you hang out with a lot of middle-aged guys too and you’d like oh you’d love it and that scenario would make fun of me
and you know what i’m not i don’t like putting myself in a situation in which okay i’m on the defensive but i already
know that you work at chippendales in this scenario i’m saying why can’t i come to a dance i think you knowing is
good enough i’m saying what is uncomfortable it’s uncomfortable that’s literally the only reason i’m not kidding you that is the
reason and but i would have i will die on this hill i’m not i already know though i don’t care so if i already know
why well why can’t i go see because your stuff yeah so you
pretty sure you put them in a little locker so no one has their phone no it’s like a
comedy show you got to put it in a little bag or whatever either way no if you were i wouldn’t come see you you
wouldn’t why not why would i want to watch that i mean i’m it’s like if i see you like
do it all the time when you walk around your underwear and you go no it’s like it’s like [ __ ] it’s like me being in theater or something you’re
seeing me it’s not theater yes it is are you kids acting it’s just a little
more a little more with the hips my uh that is just
would you ever audition for a play like say there’s one at the enumcloth that you’re down there oh [ __ ] no dude
here’s the thing the crazy thing is like a lot of celebrities and actors like english they all did that at one point it’s kind of i i just don’t think that i
could no get in that mindset to actually do it so jordan and nick are filming a movie you
want to audition because they’re hiring actors and i mean maybe i’ll be dead guy number
two or reggie yeah and then i gotta like and then like oh yeah it’s like you know you gotta spend hours of your time for
free yeah i think it’d be fun being a movie
i mean you don’t even know what part it would be i’d probably get them take it you show up hey actually you just get our drinks
for us you’re playing the intern in the movie but you gotta go get the drinks but no like i’m actually down like i don’t
think i’m a good actor but i will go [ __ ] you’re a good actor really there was more to that sentence
because you’re so [ __ ] fake yeah exactly no not that but because
you just you take on all these different little personas one of my rogers yeah literally but without the names you kind
of just name two personas or i just said without name like without it’s not like oh this is who it’s like
you just are in certain types of different guys split yeah you’re in different moods different days and you just hold that for however long you feel
like it and then you just flip a switch so do you have multi-personality disorder maybe maybe i don’t know who am i
talking to right now you’re talking to doug dude i saw [ __ ] uh i saw instagram reel and it was a girl which one she was
complaining about it which i think was kind of stupid she’s like oh like like it was so tough because she’s
married to a guy with multiple personality disorder or whatever and so then like i think he put like a toothbrush or like something on top of
the toilet and then she’s like oh that’s definitely steve so then she runs out there’s like did you do this he’s like no i’m doug steve did that i’m like
imagine [ __ ] get away with yeah maybe he’s just finessing this [ __ ] out of it maybe he is i mean because what if
one of them like because i know some of them have like different wives you know it’s like oh this girl’s moving i can’t
i don’t understand how that works to be honest but dude imagine if it’s just a guy who’s just like dude i just wanted to [ __ ] multiple women wait wait wait
wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait you’re gonna get arrested oh that wasn’t me that killed that guy it was doug i don’t know i mean
they’ve sentenced like autistic people to life in prison before so i mean i don’t think i could get away with it
where’d you see that i mean i’m sure it’s happened but like where do you get this data um when i was waiting for you outside of tanning i was
just going through snapchat and it said like oh top five life sentence reactions i’m like gotta see that
and so don’t watch you gotta watch 10 ads per person yeah dude yeah but one of them had autism
which i feel like is kind of like i don’t know if they should be sentenced to life you probably didn’t know what he was doing i guess i don’t know whoa whoa
whoa i don’t know enough about the case i don’t think you know enough about the diagnosis no i don’t either
i’m just saying like you know [ __ ] right well then if he didn’t know what he’s doing he’s not gonna mind jail i
guess right because he doesn’t know where he is oh i guess that’s true i’m not saying it’s true i’m saying yeah but if that’s what you think his tears said
otherwise after the uh that’s what i’m saying i’m pretty sure i’m not i’m not saying i’m not professional on the topic
i’m just saying i i feel like he’s pretty cognizant yeah i think he burned the house down with his like
brother in it oh yeah put him away the [ __ ] well i’m just saying like you know if you have like a condition like i
don’t know no it doesn’t matter you know who have liked who would have liked to have a life back his [ __ ] brother would be burned to a
crisp jesus so yeah throw them away i don’t care when you say it like that slammer okay yeah i don’t care that
makes sense the judge actually said it was like you you deserve like to
die with your brother or something i was like damn that’s not that’s cool that’s cool that’s a little rough but i mean it was like i’m guessing
okay he did it on purpose obviously i don’t i’m guessing he didn’t mean to kill his brother though if it was like oh yeah i was making toast in it the
house burned down an accident i don’t think i need to dig into this a little more because i don’t know i’m making a lot of them yeah because there’s a lot
of variables here because it was an accident and it was proven that that’s different but yeah you and i were going uh means it
went tanning today um remember when the [ __ ] phone went off yeah dude wait did you [ __ ] hear it we talked
about in the car i was trying to oh redo with a funny song
there’s no difference between me being like yeah yeah we talked about it yeah i heard the phone yeah i heard the phone i was in the tanning bed
and i thought it was the [ __ ] thing to switch oh like i because i had this
no yeah i had music on and so i’m just jamming out just because i knew i needed to flip over it has a beep thing and i
didn’t hear anything for a long like it always feels like you’re in there longer oh yeah and so i’m sitting there like i’m like what the [ __ ] i’m like is that
that’s gotta be yeah it’s gotta be a playhouse so i flip over and then like four minutes later right here
like [ __ ] i and so all my wires are crossed and now i’m just flip-flopping like a [ __ ] burger on the grill and i
don’t know what the [ __ ] to do and then i i don’t even know how much i did dude the [ __ ] i just kept flipping because i
was so scared i don’t know where the phone was because i like woke and i woke up i wasn’t asleep no did you do the
same thing i like looked up i pulled them like i was like what the [ __ ] i’m like
because my eyes were all so close the entire time yeah something like squinting yeah then you’re trying to see through those cones you can’t see yeah
you kind of can it’s kind of trippy not really but like it sounded like like a 1960s rotary
phone and so they kept going and it was like maybe there’s a phone in here to tell me like hey emergency burnings
buildings yeah that’s what the first thing i was thinking i’m like the only way i get you know is if someone needs to get in this room but i’m [ __ ] you
know you know i’m exposed were you nude i actually went nude but i put my uh my
[ __ ] underwear all right on my dick you went nude i did i’ve got it twice now because i don’t want any lines you
know i mean me either but on the same token after going in the plastic one dude and seeing
how much i swear i was like dude i have the balls the balls and the dick covered so oh yeah that’s the way it’s like a
little bib dude i should have put like a little chef boyardee hat for your little guy no you know the little cone just take one
of them off a hat
that would only protect whatever brand sitting on though yeah the the the tip i mean it would only be a hat if you were
a wreck you could kind of sit one in each each ball like an eye thing that’d be kind of cool
like it’s a little army helmet do you know why like some days your balls are just droopy and some days
they’re just up no but i’m interesting they actually because i don’t know i’m asking no i’m
this is actual interesting fact they move on their own how well i guess they do have like a
billion okay nothing’s in there not now obviously when you have when you’re just bored
and i’m just playing like don’t like just like squeeze them but like if you support them up you know i’m saying
you will see this like anyways and it’ll it’ll still move yeah yeah i know it’ll move it’s [ __ ] freaky can you imagine
if like yours were the only one that did that or something and you’re telling me this story i’m like dude they don’t move your ears are just like
okay it doesn’t do that it’s like like it’s a little baby chicken person out of an egg it’s just like like it’s slowly
yeah you see it like moving it’s like it’s like orbiting yeah oh that’s a good one it’s an orbit yeah no i i think it
reminds me yeah that would have been weird if you’re like i don’t and then i’m like okay i have to schedule doctor’s appointment
no it reminds me of like something off like alien versus predator or something like when it’s just like you know just [ __ ] it’s it’s like
they’re breathing kind of yeah in their own way yeah they kind of are yeah i mean there’s a you know
there’s some religions that like masturbation they believe that that’s equivalent to like aborting a billion babies because that’s
a billion babies that could have happened i don’t know because it’s technically those sperms
my my sperm so if if okay how about this to whoever whatever religion that is so if
you try to have a baby with your wife and you and she’s infertile did she just murder
a billion kids then i think cuz if that you can’t have it both ways that is true
i think that in some cultures women who can’t give birth or look down upon i think
yeah right i don’t know like maybe like what amish or some [ __ ] i don’t
know terrorists terrorists i don’t know i don’t know what actual religion they are i know
it’s islam but a lot of islam people are really nice i think it’s just extremists yeah it’s gotta be extremist groups obviously or like yeah do they hate
america or just white people who terrorists well it’s i think it’s a combination of like government and [ __ ]
no biden yeah i don’t know do you know what uh the egyptians had i told you before they
have the they’re like the first pregnancy test yeah they pee on the wheels they pee on the wheat and then if it grows they’re fertile if it doesn’t
that is crazy and it was 80 effective they did a study on like the 70s and they found out that was 80 effective which is pretty [ __ ] crazy doctors
just grabbed a bunch of pregnant [ __ ] and said hey pee on this wheat i imagine they took urine samples i don’t say that i don’t think they say hey squatting my
wheat and pee i think i think there’s people how do you get involved in these medical studies because i don’t know anyone who does this i’m pretty sure
that like medical studies i know and like sometimes i pay you oh like to be i heard if you’re a twin you can get a lot
i’m sure you can because they always want to do it because then you have a [ __ ] as closely dna as possible so you have a
control subject and then the one on the drug yeah i’m pretty sure like they pay you on depending on what it is they pay you
insulin have you ever given [ __ ] uh blood uh plasma for money yeah really how was
that oh wait plasma or blood well you don’t get paid for blood oh you get paid okay no no i have not plasma i’ve given blood i’ve never donated the
thing i don’t like about the plasma thing is usually it’s a lot of tweaks going in there for their 40 bucks yeah i’ve never donated plasma is like
is that the plasmas coming like i did it i did it for free like a charity thing yeah that’s a blood drive yes that’s
what i meant that’s i didn’t do yeah sorry i didn’t yeah i’ve never donated plasma huh well i think that one i’m not i’m not a
needle fan that is for sure it’s like okay i but the thing is i don’t have an like if i did the blood drive then okay i did
my i’m doing my good work every once in a while yeah apply some things like i really need my i want needles in my arm that bad you’re a check of charity off
the list kind of guy you know it’s like i mean i’ll do it but you know the plaza because i would rather not have needles in my own before i’d rather give you 40
bucks to not poke needles on my arm yeah that’s [ __ ] true i get that yeah i keep my possible give you 40 bucks
i heard you can get like really [ __ ] dizzy but i know at cascade when they had the blood drive and i did i [ __ ]
passed out in the green room dude no [ __ ] yeah i passed out yeah i did get i got really dizzy like blacked out for
like 10 minutes when i was like 18 i went to you took too much dude i’m going to church that my parents like you’re going to church now just white just pale
as [ __ ] like a [ __ ] vampire look like buffy the vampire i did it uh i got like an std test so
like 18 or some [ __ ] and they were testing me for like hiv i’m like i
i hope not yeah i’m like i think we’re gone but i’m like i’m confident on that one but then so they like took my blood but
i didn’t eat their [ __ ] anything and i was just like dude that’s what happened yeah that’s what happened to me if you don’t eat and they gave me a cookie afterwards which was nice they
gave me a little mini snack bag of doritos i’m like oh this’ll help and i just [ __ ] [ __ ] fall over and then
the lady thought i was faking i’m like yeah that’s i’m gonna pass out in front of all my peers for a bag of doritos
the [ __ ] outta here she’s like if you’re because i was like i was like out and she and then like i was i’d like open my eyes again i’m like what the [ __ ]
happened she’s like if okay if you’re faking it like this is not funny i’m like why would i fake this you stupid
[ __ ] what do you think is the like what’s something that you’ve like really faked
being sick so i wanted to go to school yeah that was a good one i faked being asleep a lot so i don’t have to talk to you yeah that’s a that’s a very that’s a
very popular one yeah it’s like you know i hear aaron’s little [ __ ] talons coming down the hallway and he’s like
well now you just expose your secret now she’s in here she doesn’t listen to it yeah i guarantee you she it’s a joke i
don’t actually do that no because she’s usually gonna like
she’s just gonna she’s gonna ask me for something you know it’s like i’m asleep in here but then she comes out of the room i think it was
a big thing with like parents and stuff too it was like oh yeah you’re always late up later than you should be dude i remember i wasn’t allowed to play video
games on weekdays right so i’d sit in the chair and i had the power bar wired right here and so i’d be playing and if
i heard the steps i just snacked i just smacked the freaking power bar button tv xbox everything off and then i just you
know i was like oh just sleeping in my chair yeah god i’m so smart holding your controller
i mean maybe i just wanted to sleep with it at night you know yeah i get that did you ever have like beanie babies or anything when i was like five or six my
grandma would give us beanie babies do you remember the name of one of them okay i do i remember okay
this is not a joke so he was a monkey he’s like this little one he had like little red hair and his name was jack no
[ __ ] yeah i named him jack after me i didn’t know you when i was six years old [ __ ]
i am jack my heart was full for a second like you named a beanie baby after me no i just named him that i don’t know oh
[ __ ] that’s a good name my mine was a little dog his name was spuds
oh get a phone call during business hours i am the phone caller and business hours hi uh miss
bernard was just singing your praises do you want to say anything to the uh people
what i said i was just singing your praises would you like to uh say hi to her and launch it i forgot you’re doing a
podcast sorry do you want to say something to the people hello everyone
okay you’re chatty all right i’ll call you when i get back
[Laughter] do you want to say something huh do you
want to say something i thought for some reason i thought you’re about to say well since you insist on interrupting you have to say
something yeah no um anyways we have a top five right we’re
already at 21. [ __ ] um we do have a top five um
did you get did you get all five i did okay
oh [ __ ] who goes first this time you went first last night i think okay okay uh top five uh ladies and gentlemen
today we have a top five cocktails what what cocktail cocktails such a weird where
did that go where’d that come from from cocktail where did though honey look that kid’s got a cocktail
maybe they used to like maybe there was a tail that looked like a ghost feather in it or something i was thinking maybe
they had like something like an animal how to tailor it like a [ __ ] i don’t know
the origin of the word cocktail the earliest mention historians have found of the word cocktail is in a citation
from 1789 and the satirical newspaper the london telegraph one of its articles
lists a range of party drinks including parfait amour leguile de vinos
and the cocktail oh i actually just floated through those frames yeah you actually did that was pretty impressive
i would have stumbled a little bit damn yeah all right so starting top five cocktails okay we
drink a lot of beer obviously but i do actually have some that i just really enjoy of course but on the same on the same token i i’m
a for i also think that cocktails like should be ordered
at certain times like not all the time it’s like you go to a place where like okay this is a nice place i think a
cocktail yes exactly i’m not gonna get a course i don’t say that people like every time yeah every time people go
and it’s like oh i always have to or they go to like cheap places and always get like big string or cocktails it’s like i’d rather school get a cocktail a
nice restaurant i don’t that’s just me um number five i mean my list might you might have one or two of these i don’t
know which actually there’s a couple drinks out here i’m surprised that you actually i don’t know what you have but i don’t think you’re gonna have them on here but anyways number five
i’m gonna go with the bloody mary i love a good bloody [ __ ] really i’ve never seen you i i love a good a good bloody
mary i love a good bloody mary no i love a bad bloody mary yeah you’re like a good bloody mary anyways my last oops
though um so i i love i really do like bloody mary’s that’s why it’s number five it’s not the top
but like especially after like a tough night you wake up i just feel like that little bit of spice in there it just it gives you
the extra kick and i really like it and you know what’s happening what what made it such a morning drink isn’t it i really don’t know i mean i’d assume so
but also i know it kind of helps with that feeling in the morning i mean there’s also tomato juice in it that helps
yeah yeah so yeah coming at number five we have a bloody mary um number four we’re not gonna not not sure you’re
gonna know what this is but a bee’s knees a bee’s knees a bee’s knees it’s a gin drink like uh honey it’s like simple honey
syrup and lemon juice and gin you’d really like it i mean i’ve the only the bee’s knees i’ve never seen you
order one of those well i don’t think i’ve ever worn one with you but yeah they’re really good the bees knees
do bees have knees and number three is also something with gin in it now no i i feel like you’d really
like this is the negroni the negro negroni it’s like i’ve never had campari
ah i forgot what else is it like a jet it’s a gin in it too super [ __ ] good um i mean i think
it’s just it’s good for any occasion it’s good for a nice dinner it’s good for just a night out on the town you see you’re
sitting at the bar at a really nice place why don’t you start with a negroni i don’t know the word but i’m guessing
like you know if i don’t know what to get on the list i see something with gin oh i thought you i thought you were trying to explain the
name right you know the first thing i think of like i i definitely hear the negro in there i thought that’s what you’re about to say no also bees do have
knees by the way um yeah i know i mean are they really knees
are they is it just because they bend the most like a knee is between the tibia and the femur
they do have joints yes yeah okay what does this mean but like most insects are divided into six parts you have the
thorax yeah yeah six that’s three head thorax abdomen
the wings i don’t know that’s the part they just said i don’t know um number two
moscow mule i [ __ ] love moscow i thought our lists were going to be so much more similar um moscow i love a
moscow mule um and i might be doing this number one because of the
fact it’s such a good party drink everyone loves them and there’s a few different flavors that you can get you
could drink so many of them and they really never get old the infamous margarita you can’t go
wrong with a [ __ ] margarita the reason why it’s also a number one i’m not saying it’s like the best i’ve had
good margarita but mar you could have a bad margarita you’re still like it’s a margarita in a [ __ ] drink exactly you know and it’s
it’s just good because it’s kind of like the jack of all trades of drinks it’s
just always you’re always going to enjoy it especially in the summer time whatever the case may be blended is even really good and they put them in like a
big candy yeah and you get strawberry it’s just strawberry lemonade it’s just it’s really good sharing drink because
you can fit several straws yeah so my number one seed for all those reasons you know not just taste even though the
other ones are kind of have a lot to do with taste okay margarita’s got to be at number one for the ease of use it’s literally the iphone of drinks
everyone likes it everyone everyone you know likes using them so it’s usually tequila in them right yeah
yeah i would if i’m not in a nice place i’ll substitute it for fun
nice place what does that mean if i’m in a nice restaurant i don’t think they’d be serving margaritas but
oh okay if i’m in like a nice place i don’t want to offend them oh okay if i’m in the mexican restaurant i
thought you meant because it’s tequila like it does something like if i’m in a nice i think like a nice space in my head
i’m like what the [ __ ] are you the hulk if i’m mentally like yeah i mean
so yeah those are my lists i’m gonna go quickly through really quick so yeah hit me starting in my five hole bloody mary
four bees knees number three negroni number two moscow mule and number one
margarita god i love it i love it so you had a couple a couple good
sophisticated cocktails that aren’t just you know okay what we usually drink like oh a [ __ ] screwdriver yeah you know what i
mean so what is the one where you take you know the little mats they have while they’re making drinks the little black
mats with the little stubs yeah you know when they take all the liquid out of that put it in a glass and hand it to you
that’s actually a real drink you can order it i’m sure that’s like what hobos yeah probably what is that called i don’t
remember i know what you’re talking about i keep thinking or like not but i can’t no it’s not no i know it’s not that but it has something like cardboard
they do the same thing with like if like or the trash can or something like you know the little catcher from underneath the drinks like with your
pouring beer they have leaves you said like i’ll pour those out in the stream not for obviously they’re paying customers but it’s someone that’s like
hey this kraken wants something this crackhead needs a bunch which i still don’t i still feel like i would probably just give him a beer
yeah i’d be like i’ll buy it for you i’m not gonna [ __ ] but then he’s gonna keep coming back he’s like he’s like that [ __ ] straight cat you give him
some friskies one time and then you know now he’s meowing at your door every day so you gotta cycle it out every day
every day every day every day the [ __ ] comes with the [ __ ] cat why are they called
[ __ ] the cats vaginas no cats
which one is first was the puss was the cat called the [ __ ] first or was the vagina i feel like
i feel like it was the [ __ ] cat i think so i feel like it was a push again i feel like it was a [ __ ] kid
and then some guy was just you know it was definitely the pussycat the [ __ ] came first
um according to the oxford english dictionary [ __ ] first came from the word puss commonly used as a call name
for cats back then there you go and then then hence cat calling oh yeah there we go there we go but who
saw a [ __ ] or no sorry who saw a vagina instead it was just like you little [ __ ] because i’m assuming it just it just
came out they don’t look like cats no but it hadn’t rang off i mean whoever did did a great job
because that’s a perfect name for him yeah i mean what else would you call like a nickname for a vagina i mean it looks like it like it seems like it
would be called like a like a creature name or something kind of creature like a megalodon or
something no i think like the [ __ ] one [ __ ] is my favorite word for the nether regions
of a woman um i i would say pussy’s a great word yeah what are the other ones isn’t like snizz
one of them is
oh yeah a vulgar reference to the female sex organs specifically the vagina
urban dictionary here’s a [ __ ] scene you’re out there getting some sneeze i was beating up that snizz with my ramrod
wow dude that snizz just ate a rat oh wait what
no another neighborhood she just ate a red no another name for another definition for snaze is a small walrus
like animal mostly found in the east tropics they feed on small vermin so um
let’s see what other words we have for [ __ ] other words for [ __ ] you that laugh i just did
okay colin’s dictionary vagina synonyms the vulva the volvo i think i said volvo for a
second but [ __ ] obviously box hole crack snatch fanny
beaver yeah yeah beaver is my favorite one too i love being muff i like muff that’s a good one [ __ ]
[ __ ] yeah classic that’s a classic yoni
yoni oh did you ask him to say it
[Music] or min or punani okay yeah that’s [ __ ] good the band the bad
jingo the jingle the [ __ ] was that
word of the day is coochie i don’t know i also like i also like uh like
pecker piss missile oh yeah those are good some good ones the jj bajingo
which apparently is when vag meets bingo two of life’s most brilliant things yeah uh foof are you still you still haven’t
done your top five drinks the minky you my minky my minky stinks
my minky stinky the the mary ellen
okay i know you’re but there’s probably thousands of others so i think you should get your drinks okay i’m almost
done front bottom i’m almost done page two kitty you i don’t like that whispering
eye the lady garden the new new the due date
the axe wound i guess oh that’s oh bad
dude that’s terrible wow beef curtains forgot about that one if you if you were a girl do you do you think that you’d be
like a really vocal like a feminist no [Laughter]
you didn’t finish i’ll just say like vocal during like would you if you were a girl i feel
like for some reason i can picture you being like a really loud girl you’d be like yeah you like this [ __ ]
yeah i mean i get a little i’m definitely a talker
i mean are you a talker like a whisper no i’m like you know it’s it’s it’s one of those like you know and i’m not
saying like yeah like i was about to do it but like like yeah yeah and i quote yeah yeah oh no you
know what i mean not that i mean like no like this [ __ ] yeah i mean um
what was that in euphoria that the i don’t know the guy’s name because i only watched it when aaron watched it but and he was telling her he’s like
he’s like this is my sweet little [ __ ] he’s like telling me this is my only little boy
there’s something [ __ ] weird i don’t like that there’s like he’s like your little [ __ ] your sweet [ __ ] is mine i don’t [ __ ]
that’s weird i don’t like the you know it’s like uh i guess i’m more like one of those like
you know it’s like yeah you know i’m moving um i’m trying to think i’m trying to think of the right way to say this
yeah you know weird yeah it’s kind of like the i [ __ ] know [Laughter]
my [ __ ] voice cracked jesus no
no like uh my voice cracked cut that out
what are you gonna do there i love that so much that’s what we’re about to do no just like i’m not a big big like uh
it’s more like it’s like i [ __ ] love you i [ __ ] love you too like i [ __ ] love you no you’re not i’m not one of those like
uh oh my god i don’t get like crazy emotional i guess
what were you about to say when you first smacked that’s what i was trying to say but it didn’t come out on my voice
it’s gonna be a good clip good uh no i mean i definitely i do
i’m not a silent fighter there you go i’m not a silent [ __ ] i definitely like to make some noise yeah i i’m not
talking about noise i was just saying no no i’m not talking about like skin slapping skin noise i’m talking
about i know yeah i know what about you are you like are you i feel like you’re
a grunter just no i am not a grunter and no ain’t no chance
i’m a seductive guru some would say okay um but i’m saying it it’s i mix i mix it up
you know what i mean i’m not saying the same thing every time yeah but yeah i’m not just like i’m not saying i’m just silent just
i mean i would say everyone does a little moan it’s not a grump but it’s just like a oh
for some reason when you talk about it it’s way funnier than like in your mind you’re like oh yeah this is going to sound normal because you know what i’m
talking about but then you have to like yeah like yeah yeah or it’s like are you like that this is
this is going so far off [ __ ] topic [ __ ]
are you like the the actual motor are you like like the i’m running out of breath oh
or it’s just like the heavy exhales yeah i i think i do that though yeah cause like
you know if you’re putting a lot of hip thrust into it yeah yeah no and then it’s just like it gets strenuous when you’re on doing all the work yeah that’s
yeah that’s right yeah i mean you know we’re we have stamina
you know the [ __ ] guys typically do so sometimes you know she’ll you know the woman gets on top but the majority
i’m not kidding you i thought you were about to be sometimes a woman will no i’m saying i think the disagreement
i’m wrong and it’s not a bad thing no it’s statistically speaking i believe the guys do a lot more like physically
yeah physically yeah yeah the girls i mean they have their own little magic they have about themselves yeah of course except in porn the guy just sits
there and she’s just doing tricks [Laughter] she’s like right is he doing like
just like a kick flip off of him or something
[Laughter] skater’s friend yeah hey if i land this
ollie i get a kiss um okay top five cocktails uh coming in number five the mojito
i almost put mojito on mine mojito you know it’s just one of those [ __ ] drinks that just and it’ll get you there
real good and it’s uh i definitely don’t have a lot up here but in mexico i had a lot of them mojitos are good it was good
that’s good i’m just i don’t really have a lot to say about that one but i do have for the fourth one coming in at a
coming in at clean up uh gin and pineapple juice now the i would never order this but i
put it on here because if you actually you would never order it but you put it on your top five list i i
make them or like like dupe makes them a lot and i and it’s a cocktail
so you would never order one but it’s on your top five because i don’t know people just have like a can of pineapple juice sitting there do they
bars i mean yeah if you make drinks a lot yeah pineapple juice is always there oh okay i didn’t know that most of the time i just don’t want to be that guy
that’s like says something then they don’t so let me get let me get this straight you have a drink on your top five that you would never order not
because of the quality of the drink because i didn’t know if they’d have the ingredients but it’s only two ingredients i don’t
[ __ ] know anyways gin and pineapple juice uh my uncle made them all the [ __ ] time and to be
honest they’re good it should be higher i like them that much it should be higher on my list i
just don’t order it all the time number three which i’m surprised this is not on your list actually three of my top three
thought we’re gonna be on your list okay so well doesn’t mean i don’t like them yeah i want a lot of push and shove over
my list i deleted a bunch and then we’ll put more and then i kept going back and forth a lot of mental battles you know battling battling with with yourself
number three the mimosa oh well i love [ __ ] mimosas yeah but like it’s just like i said instead i
added a couple maybe a little more sophisticated ones instead of just like you know what i mean i i wanted to i think it was top five like our
preferences and thing is i haven’t never seen you order four out of the five of those things do you ever think that maybe you haven’t
paid attention or do you ever think maybe you weren’t there that’s true but i feel like most the
time i’m drinking you’re you’re there but like we said before it’d be at a nice restaurant and most of the time we don’t go out to nice restaurants we just
go to the bar you know yeah yeah that that makes sense okay number two rum and coke rum and coke’s
just it has to be there i actually [ __ ] love rum it just doesn’t love me back yeah i
agree i get absolutely [ __ ] blacked on it and then i can’t i start doing weird [ __ ] start getting [ __ ]
cuckoo that’s me and tequila dude i get cuckoo as [ __ ] dude like like i’m
like i’ll be hugging you about to cry and then i’ll like be snapping a toddler
it’s a wave of emotions yeah it’s like this like low of like i want to cry and just give you my soul and then after
that i’m just like hey dude you want to go like [ __ ] play darts and you’re probably just like what the [ __ ] was that i’ll drown you in the hot tub yeah
yeah uh number one you know what it is we all [ __ ] know what it is it’s the [ __ ] sonic it is
really like gin tongs i think they’re good but i don’t know if they’d be in the wrong oh it is my number one cocktail really can’t there yeah the the
gin and tonic one it is good because one it can be a club drink it can be a bar drink it can be a
fancy drink obviously very versatile they’re not gonna put beef eater gin in it it’s gonna be like tanqueray or
something but it’s like you can order that drink in any
class of life as a upper class if you’re [ __ ] wealthy or gin and tonic that’s not weird you can be [ __ ] broke gin
and tonic not weird you could be a lot of people hate gin and tonics really a lot of people do and i actually just surprised i’m saying most of the people
like a lot of people like i don’t order gin talks that much better than times of boardroom and the building
that was our vegas drink when we went yeah it was good yeah i mean it’s just like when we go to vegas for example i will
probably it’s going to be expensive but i’m going to get into growing your bee’s knees 100 because i will have a bee’s knees with you yeah you would like it or
i will have the bees in between the femur and yeah i mean honestly i i probably won’t be getting tons of
cocktails just because they’re so [ __ ] ridiculously expensive but i’m definitely gonna i’m gonna buy some of them oh yeah i’m definitely gonna get
into groningen bee’s knees a couple times yeah no i uh i mean i think personally we get absolutely
[ __ ] up in the hotel before we go out smartest thing to do because we’re gonna yeah don’t we have a bar in our
we do but like oh yeah we’re going to vegas so everyone by the way we didn’t even talk about that we leave in three days yeah
well anyways that’s what we talked about after but anyways that was the list
no i was saying anyways we’re like where can they find you they can find me
on instagram because i was done with the episode oh what time where are we at we’re at 41 but i was going to talk about vegas
i was going to tell the fans we just did vegas we’re seeing snoop saturday
morning the beach club if any of you guys are there hit us up we’re seeing tyga
seeing [ __ ] tyga he’s gonna perform uh yeah
it is a good summer time it you know why he’s probably a big deal like a lot over there so much it’s because he has that
he’s got that type of that’s that type of music is that club and hot soup he’s going to be playing that [ __ ] that song
dude like hot noodle you know what i actually respect the the zone he was in that song i felt like
he was in love with an asian woman and he just i don’t respect it’s terrible that wasn’t bad
it wasn’t sip a little featuring gucci okay i’m just saying you would send that to me as a
joke yes hot soup was a low for tigers yes for those who don’t know listen to hots i feel like okay
it’s kind of a banger i also don’t i feel like myself included i don’t like listen to
tiger like no i don’t either it just it was one of those only if like those once in a while like he has like one taste
came out i played it a few times but i’m saying yeah i’ve never been like dude like i’m just gonna shuffle tiger’s
album today and just [ __ ] listen to five no yeah but like the uh no what i’m saying is like it was unlike apple music
and it was like new tiger albums like okay i’ll just see what’s here and then i said hot soup and i’m like how good
could this be so about how good can you to be honest it is a joke but it’s not a horrible
song it’s got you’ve said how bad it is it’s terrible no i think it’s terrible for
tyga yes that is not a tiger you actually you think it’s a good song i’m saying out of all the years you’ve
clowned it and sent it to me sarcastically you think it’s a good song this is what i think and this is what i’m going to tell you one i don’t really know my real opinion
on it it’s i’m kind of i’m in between opinions okay but ted like honey noodle soup it’s so bad bro
no this is what i’m saying if i pre like say i’m on a road trip right so i i typically should listen
start to finish and you’re sitting there singing she can make me feel better feel better baby hop in the scoop
dude come on man you’ve got you got some nerves listen to what i’m saying
i’m not saying i love it i’m not saying i hate it i think it’s f i think it’s sarcastic in the way that it came out of
tyga’s mouth okay number one number two i’m going to say if i just press shuffle and it comes on
i probably won’t skip it that’s the weirdest thing i’ve ever heard i’m just like okay i’ll vibe to
hot soup in fact it’s called hot soup like hot noodle soup
baby hop in this coop we can go wherever no
this ain’t no interview you do listen to it a lot don’t you i do know the lyrics yeah you do
well that’s gonna pretty much do it we got 45 uh thank you for checking out around the lunch table uh
yeah make sure you check out that summer collection patreon check out our instagram we’ll post a lot of our [ __ ] on there [ __ ] it uh z
where can they find you they could find me um at isaiah underscore lesney james
where can they find you they can find me a jack underscore
spencer both of our instagrams that are on the lunch table make sure you check out patreon.com launch table for exclusive content or
episodes early-ish and that’ll pretty much do it yeah um it is gonna do it um
summer collection is out um did you ever so all of it’s all right we didn’t finish the one shirt okay the
one shirt but most of it’s outrageous be sure to go over there check it out and we will be posting stuff on the
stories just so you can see what what the [ __ ] it looks like blah blah blah blah blah blah anyways
when our next episode will be after vegas hopefully we’ll have some good stories yeah hopefully so and hopefully
not any bad stories but yeah uh like we got kicked out or something i want to incite a riot i want to start a
writer i would do that if i can guarantee you i wouldn’t get caught under trouble i want to get i want to i want to do some bad things
why not it’s sin city i don’t care if we kill someone hang over here anyways alright guys
thanks for listening and we’ll see you next week and see ya [Music]
let’s get rowdy up in here

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Episode 73