J & Z talk about a cat winning a court case, each other toxic traits, vegas, and a top 5 favorite candies.
[Music] is it recording it is now
all right we’re here we’re good oh
[Music] um great movie yeah it is welcome back
slap dicks this is around the launch table episode [ __ ] nine baby
[Music] a big milestone and first and foremost before actually first and foremost part
of the sponsors yes we took a little bit of a hiatus we had a busy week i was gone then jack was gone or jack was gone
then i was gone so we were all over the place um we really couldn’t do anything about it so yeah that did happen for
episode 69 if you listen last episode we did want to you know we talked about [ __ ] each other but that’s no no no
no you’re saying something have someone [ __ ] on the table yeah yeah like 69 right there yeah um we asked around um
didn’t get any uh initial volunteers but maybe because we weren’t uh i think if we compensated more yeah probably are
you getting sick you sound a little shitty no i just lost my voice i think it was they’re getting sick no i’ve had my voice lost for like four
days had your voice lost i don’t know where what oh i’m saying do you sound a little nasally sound like you’re getting sick
but i mean you’re getting over it oh you’re oh are you one of those people
no my voice has been lost for like four
[ __ ] days now with no other symptoms so i’m chilling i think maybe i was just a little too rowdy this weekend yeah you
know a mixture of dehydration no lose your voice from partying yeah
i guarantee you’re at work like hi how can i help you yeah you’re completely fine you come home yeah
i mean i’m so saying i’m faking this no you’re a milker oh
[Music] don’t do that again yeah because it
doesn’t sound good yeah but i mean if you really anyway if you cleared your throat
um uh episode 69 very excited uh oh whoa
sponsors what the [ __ ] um first and foremost one i forgot to do the sponsors yeah no no that is what it is i’m not interrupting but the sponsors need to
have their flags or else that marches or else the whole ship sinks continue
um first foremost want to shout out aperture oceans bringing ideas and ads to life and then also wanted to start
that shout out live a stallion never be it’s not
uh liv stalin never be tamed uh wellness and fitness page started by our good friend an atlt alumni brandon bodiado
yes look it up on instagram liv stallion spelled the usual way and then brandon badiado brandon spelled the usual way
b-a-t-t-a b-a-t-t i-a-t-o um streams monday through friday um
watch him twerk and do weird yeah um i think he just got temporarily banned
but i think he did um i didn’t see that yeah he did he was who i think he posted like
post on politics [ __ ] i know he does but he posted like his uh sternly written letter to youtube
he’s like he brandon could be one of those people that’s like if he sees something in a book that he thinks is weird he’ll write
a letter to the editor yeah exactly like hey i don’t know about this yeah it’s like like yelp it down yeah like you know he
got a bad box i mean we haven’t hung out brand i mean i haven’t hung out brandon a long time we’ve always been really really good friends over there
um probably one of my best friends of all time um right behind you of course um
do you think that as he’s gotten older he’s kind of turned in into a yelp kind of guy yeah i think
that like i’m getting i get yelp vibes from his attitude and the way he approaches things i think like say he
bought a box of crackers and there was too many smush at the bottom he would write nabisco i also feel like he
spelled checks like a google review yeah yeah i think i think
as he lost the weight the head got bigger you know i’m gonna have to make a clip of this
instead of joking oh of course of course he knows he’s out of love he actually uh messaged me today the cool thing is he’s
not gonna listen to this because he’s too cocky yeah exactly no um he actually messaged me today on linkedin he was
like congrats on the working anniversary it’s like thanks like thanks i sat here for this long that’s how i got here
yeah uh third uh sponsor got moles if you have moles in the puget sound area
servicing northern seattle to southern tacoma they are your premier number one
destination for mole extermination that just came out of my mouth that was cool uh they are also the legal murder yeah
you want to commit genocide pay these guys a couple hundred bucks um yeah they’re also uh a mole association
trusted vendor um wait what does that mean the american mole association
yeah i didn’t know there was such a success i just bought the domain name
um american bowl association vendor uh yeah great guy he’ll also make you laugh
uh he’ll make you cry too beautiful dude uh but yeah he’ll make sure you got no moles no no mo
so yeah but dude episode 69 yeah we’re sorry we [ __ ] missed out yeah we kind
of once we were well actually i think there is something we need to throw on the table yeah we need to
address this because i think it matters um immensely and this is actually part of your toxic trait that i might i might
change no no by the way later in the episode it’s gonna get very interesting because james and i are going to tell each other what
we think um not like a bunch of things just like our most toxic traits or traits could be
one or two things yes um but this isn’t i’m not saying it right now but i just want to say talk to the truth no
no this is for the fans this is about the fans it’s about the listeners it’s the people who pay to listen to us because what you said
something it was the darnest thing i was in the bathroom and i think it was before you guys went to dinner with
bailey and jordan because we were gonna leave the next day correct yes and you d to be fair okay yeah you did tell
me yes because i was like hey we gotta do an episode tomorrow cause i’m gonna be gone yes and you did tell me that and then you came back like oh i thought
we’re having a bye week yeah so actually so i i know i said sorry to the fans but
i’m not sorry because it’s your fault so what i am gonna say is is i remember one us on facetime
uh i was absolutely [ __ ] shit-faced in pendleton um that night and i remember
thinking that like no you weren’t your face you were home alex and i were on the couch alex’s witness you were i’m like hey we got
whatever i’ll do whatever we gotta do if we gotta do some you know do it no
you came you were at home we were on the couch we were on the couch what is the thing i know that’s wrong
there’s no way you don’t know why why because i didn’t get back until thursday no i saw you that okay i don’t
i forgot what time it was no but whatever it was i’m saying but i told you maybe it was a couple days i’m like
let’s get on let’s get it out of the talk okay let’s let’s just get here okay let’s just get to this point are you okay yes
right after this are you so are you is your counter counteroffer basically that
you did not say that you would do an episode before
i’m not saying that i’m not oh i’m not saying that i’m telling you if i can explain myself
you’re saying you were drunk when you said it no let me finish one no we did not sit on the couch and talk no i was sitting you
weren’t sitting i was sitting on the couch you were walking into the living room no because you were in the shower that was when you guys left for dinner
not that day it was not that day was not that day listen to me it was not that day let me talk i’m listening you’re not
letting me talk i am letting you talk i was gone tuesday i was gone wednesday and i got back thursday around three
o’clock so not one time was i home now the second we got home we had reservations at 6 30. i got home at 5 45
i got ready aaron was in there you went straight to the shower like you usually do and i remember saying
you asked me about the episode and i remember we had talked about it on facetime the night before not in person
yes no we didn’t because wait why would you be sitting on the couch it wasn’t it wasn’t it wasn’t i’m saying it
wasn’t the day it wasn’t the day before like the dinner time i was like hey because the day before i do remember
shouting from the bathroom are we not doing an episode and you’re like oh no i got dinner reservations i’m like
oh cause you were i wasn’t here no the day before i mean the day before i left
yeah so i’m saying you were here not you were here yes about to go to junior you’re putting on your little black sport jacket you thought you were hot
[ __ ] okay and so you’re walking through the house you’re prancing you have the smugs
so no that’s and on facetime we very well might have discussed it but we did and i don’t remember which day it was i i’m not
cause i’m not gonna pinpoint today because i couldn’t be wrong which one it is but you walked in to the living room and
your feet were sticking to the wood as usual and you said
i was like hey we have to do an episode though because we’re already late by this point and i was like we have to do
an episode i’m like because i’m going to be gone and you’re like tell me something whatever i gotta do i’ll do it you know that uh the thing
was is that i was under the assumption we were getting back around eight which we did but you guys were already gone
that’s when i texted you understand understandable so there we go let’s [ __ ] can that because okay so we can that right now uh anyways
wanted to say sorry to the fans i was in vegas for a few days which by the way vegas what a beautiful beautiful place i
think it is very playground baby it is very strange how one i would love to you know i don’t
like museums i’m not a big guy i want to see how vegas was founded how the [ __ ] did they you know like they had to pass a law
that was like yo [ __ ] can [ __ ] do you ever see the underground um like
underground railroad did you know she used to knock babies out i just i saw that isn’t that
intriguing can you imagine a babe i mean to be fair it’s it’s the needs of the mini ally they need to see baby cries
she knocked she was knocking babies punches him or just like held him by the feet and just oh well that would keep like a [ __ ]
trout no i i’m saying that’s very interesting and it makes sense because they’re sneaking around there’s dogs there’s
people people looking for them just give that baby a nice little smack i remember they called it the underground railroad because it wasn’t underground and there
wasn’t a railroad when i was younger i thought it was literally i’m like these people dug a tunnel no it made a world
road it was just like a like a southern house with a quilt up yeah it was just like yeah it’s like it was it was like
cool over metaphorically like it’s an underground railroad how is it a railroad yeah but she’s the one who was
like free in slaves right yeah she yes that’s exactly what she did that’s what she was known for um
but anyways as i was going with that did you see that there’s a documentary advice vice news has great documentary i love vice documentaries you’ve seen vice
documentaries yeah that’s right yeah i had the hamilton one i loved that one look at the underground cities of vegas like
those big storm drains and [ __ ] they’re huge they’re massive we walked past one remember they’re massive but it doesn’t
rain that much there so people there’s hundreds of thousands of people live in
like these little communes under the [ __ ] city dude remember when we had to walk back excuse me
number one you’re fighting it off you’re fine remember when we had to uh walk back to the strip and so we came in from
the highway and there was just that underpass it looks like grand theft auto when you drive by those things in l.a yeah [ __ ] crazy i mean that’s a good
place i feel like it’s a desert it’s cool down there you know i feel like if i’m homeless like i would like if you’re
homeless where are you going let me i’m going to save up all my money vegas that’s the only place to go no i’m saying like you’re homeless now like
where are you going i feel like i get a one-way ticket to like hawaii or something because it’s like you could just sleep on the beach yeah
something like that would probably be warm it would be most it would but a lot of those people probably don’t have money for tickets or something like that well i’m saying just you know
yeah it’s a 300 one-way ticket yeah you know you can’t you can figure out how to get 300 bucks right that’s true yeah yeah um
start over i don’t know that’s where i’d go but anyways [ __ ] vegas i think
one magical city it’s a 24-hour city and i love that i mean it’s like 48 hours
max no i’m saying like it never it never goes oh i’ve been going for 24 hours i’d say 48 hours i think two days is two
full day i’m not like two maybe maybe three depending if you’re doing maybe touristy things first yeah but if you’re
going it’s two days if you’re going as in you’re going there to party that’s that that’s that’s a two-day i have and
i was even told that the first time we went they were like because we were planning on three they’re like dude two days because there are those people that
go and they do things and then go to the show and then do the nightlife thing but if you’re going there for the night life
which most people do yeah then i i don’t know i mean i mean i just i feel like that’s also a place where you just tend
to get a little more wild oh yeah there’s definitely something in the air and it’s probably aids but yeah there
could be a dis the uh when i was there on tuesday go walk through the airport there was billboards on billboards of
this magician okay i’m not a big magic guy but i’m saying if you’re headlining in vegas you gotta be pretty [ __ ] oh what does he look like do you have
glasses um he kind of looked like uh like an emo guy you have glasses with weird blonde
issues yeah yeah yes yes is that guy crazy yeah he’s cracked but he’s super good yeah yeah no i meant like crazy
like crazy good not like yeah he’s a little he’s a little on the outside well he wanted to pursue magicians he’s gotta
be a little is there a lot of money in magic if you’re headlining in vegas i mean yeah
but um i know who you’re talking about he’s on tv do you think there’s like managers for [ __ ] [ __ ] magicians he calls like a
[ __ ] like a concert hall hey my guy mike an amazing magician yeah
dude i it was my card i don’t know no i know exactly the way you’re talking
about he looks like a [ __ ] evil lizard yeah yeah exactly yeah yeah well he always wears like the black wooden glasses
short on the sides yeah his billboard was [ __ ] it was on the side of the [ __ ] enclosure he’s a very popular
yeah he’s very popular yeah i feel like i think that was an early thing that they got popular right then but no one
does it now but if it’s if you’re if you got pop like david blaine or whatever yeah it’s just it’s uh like i would go
to see i just want to know like so is there like a like a hogwarts a magic school exactly like where do you
learn this like is you going to professor’s class he’s like all right how to do sleight of hand yeah exactly i
don’t know but it’s like so when they do these big acts like i feel like i mean they got to have people
they can have like a board of writers or something right like there’s no way they’re just coming up with this all right you’re going to drop me in the shark tank and then the keys
yeah i don’t know obviously magic’s all an illusion most of the time but that was so good really there’s a little
magic to it yeah the magic that we make up that’s the whole point yeah it’s your
imagination no i i like how did that pigeons come out of that poon yeah pigeons come out of plumes no but that’s
not a good magic trick she just spreads her legs and some [ __ ] it’s okay i think you’re lying let’s see pigeons fly to a [ __ ]
um speaking of well actually speaking of pigeons and [ __ ] it has nothing to do with my topic i found this that’s the
name of our episode pigeons and [ __ ] can we put pigeons in poon pigeon poon pidges pigeons
that sounds like an old orchard i found this amazing article this happened in washington on may 9th which was very recently um and i saw this um the
article now doesn’t say what city i could have swore it said bellevue but i’m not sure but anyways so
washington state cat and owner are now 125 thousand dollars
richer is the title okay okay so wait the cat yes yes
okay so the owner’s name is anna anna won a settlement after misca her cat was accused of trespassing and taunting
other pets for years so her cat racked up violations and
fines i don’t know how okay does it have a social security number i don’t know so the cat racked up more than 30
violations in 30 thousand dollars in fines um the cat
that’s a cat just a player like no one cares like does he have a bank account was he gonna go try and get
a loan yeah the cat walks with a suit and tied a chase trying to get so i’m saying if the cat doesn’t pay
so anna the owner won a settlement after misca her cat was accused of trespassing and taunting other pets for years so
there was even an attempt to have the cat put down or kicked out of k it was in king county it was in king county king county but um anna went to court
and won so safe to say her case was very persuasive [Laughter]
but the cat and her she went to court for this cat and won 125 thousand dollars okay please
tell me please tell me is there a picture of the cat sitting like no i know i don’t like on the trial
stand you know it’s got to put its paw in the bible you know it’s other witnesses like a [ __ ]
beagle or something oh my god it’s like in the bee movie how does that even [ __ ] work how do you
get awarded money for your cat doing [ __ ] yeah also like the government this
is like the [ __ ] government united states government gave you 125 grand
just to shut you when you fought in court because your cat racked up fine who’s lawyers and when is it illegal for
a cat to taunt and how do you know when it’s taunting i don’t understand the uh
a lot of questions there i mean if the cat racked up the fines i mean it doesn’t pay him okay it goes through the system goes through collections it’s on
your crap the [ __ ] cat comes out like an orange jumpsuit with chains on his applause
it’s got glasses on sitting in the [ __ ] i just i would really hope the cat was
in the [ __ ] courtroom you know like and they put it on the stand to ask your questions it’s lawyers a golden
retriever it’s got a little pea coat on and some glasses
oh my god your honor oh everyone just loves it
oh speaking again speaking of which maybe this is why i got fined yeah this is trespassing
this is exactly maybe this is exactly what it meant maybe we were maybe we’re out of bounds yeah taunting i mean i’m just saying like a cat doesn’t care
about a credit score no just just don’t pay the fines and i don’t understand how a cat can be awarded money i really
don’t like like ever seen that thing like this lady died and he was in the news like in her cat don’t jump he’s
trying to jump on your macbook oh he was hit his head on the fireplace
we’re good he was trying to jump on your macbook anyways i’m saying this the lady died and the cat inherited her whole
estate and it’s like the cat the cat you didn’t have any friends you didn’t have anyone not one
not even the nice guy at starbucks even at that point even at that point i’m pretty sure isn’t it the law
like if no one is there to claim it the government gets it i mean i think that like if you know
you’re going to die like and you i mean i guess you’re just you’ve got that you’re just a piece of
[ __ ] well that or it’s like what about i mean just might as well like the guy you got coffee from was super nice to you
like just give it to him like i know because what’s it gonna do
what’s it gonna do travel the world on your credit card it’s got a little briefcase in a fedora [ __ ]
traveling around like it’s got like a scrapbook of all the places it’s been leaning against the tower um
yeah i feel like that’s maybe she was at such an old age that’s just what she’s yeah in each picture is gonna love this and
each picture of the scrapbook the cat’s just in a different outfit for like the country it’s in you know in [ __ ] like
and like and like ireland it’s got suspenders on and [ __ ] i don’t know i love that all right on to our next on our next on our next um so this part of
the of the show is going to be very very interesting because i asked um
let’s like just one obviously um well my title says jack smokes one of jack’s most toxic traits okay um and i want you
to first because i always go first oh okay and i want you you have to be you have to and a lot you have to be very specific and analyze why you think this
okay i can’t wait to hear this oh yeah yeah you can’t [ __ ] wait don’t look at mine i see you [ __ ] screen peeking
like no i just saw screaming in the paragraphs i was like no it’s that was the list of oh
notes okay well yeah i just saw numbers like it’s just surprised like a bunch of [ __ ] no no um
that’s the top five we have so i have to go first so i’m gonna say and you probably already know this but um it
takes so you will admit when you’re wrong i’ll give you that but it takes an army and
you will not admit you were wrong until you are backed in a corner with no ammunition
left 20 guns pointed out you didn’t find you’re like i was wrong i was wrong like that’s literally [ __ ] you like
you will at some point because so in the future you can say well i’ve admitted i’m wrong in the past but yeah do you
think i think that foreign i’m talking so that way you know it’s setting yourself up for the future we all know
and so what it is it’s a little investment it’s like i’ll admit i’m wrong this time after two hours of arguing just so that
like the next time we get an argument it’s like it’s like well you know it takes a big man to make when he’s wrong
and i am that big man and so then that’s funny you know that that is what i would say it’s like you will but not until
one it doesn’t even matter anymore so you’re waiting for the other person to give up or you finally do when you’re
out of ammunition there you go that’s a very interesting take and honestly that piggy backs right into what i’m gonna
say i know um well mine’s kind of a two-parter [Laughter]
so i wrote um one of jack’s most toxic so you don’t
have a refute or a bottle or oh i do but i just thought i’d lay mine on the table too so we get the fireball sure um
mine’s worded very well um jack comma loves to give the appearance of
intelligence even on topics he knows nothing about astricht
okay i’ve known him for 17 years and i have heard him admit four times maybe when he was wrong or so let’s let’s
dissect okay okay loves to give the appearance of intelligence you do you’re okay you are an intelligent guy i will
give you that but you overdo it it’s completely overkill it’s completely overkill and if
anyone if you were to wear a suit and walk in someone start talking someone like oh is this guy like a phd or something but because you sound smart
because but you’re not really smart but you you sound smart and you like to get you like you are
overall a very you’re an intellect i would vote you in an intellectual okay i appreciate that you are you’re very
clever guy you’re very smart but but it’s it’s it’s the methods you
use to enhance your intelligence okay um is
methods i use to enhance like [ __ ] aligning my chakras what the [ __ ] you’re talking about not maybe physical methods
but you certain mental methods like the way you approach a conversation okay to interject these certain words
so you come off a certain way okay at a certain point can you give me an example and it’s absolutely obnoxious
now see i i am going to review one thing of that is that if it’s a topic i know
nothing about i won’t act like i know something about it you know but it’s a topic that
like for example like this is a complete i’m not saying you’ve done this like in this actual example as an analogy
you you could go on a cruise ship and then you and then get back and then the next weekend someone’s asking like
someone’s talking about a cruise ship and then you’d be telling them how the engines work
yeah they only go about 60 knots and you have no idea and you have no idea
i don’t think i’d blow [ __ ] out of my ass but i think you don’t blush your ass but like if you get a pinch you’ll take
a handful i’ll take an inch to a mile you know yeah yeah yeah i got you okay no that’s
that’s good yeah because i cuz because mine mine is unless i have 20 guns pointed at me and i have nowhere to
go then i’ll admit where i’m wrong because later on i can use that which i don’t think that far ahead so but anyways
but on on the flip side of that we can’t even get you to that side we can’t get you to that point
so i mean i think we both have a i mean definitely some deeper issues to work through obviously yeah do you think
this is a stupid idea but i i don’t know why this is kind of funny would it be kind of funny to go to therapy together no no yeah yeah go to
therapy and for the sake for the sake of of pretending
that we’re a gay couple and see what the guy or the thera the
therapist thinks that would be fun and like just act like and not we don’t have to be actually gay
there yeah like and and then i mean like just start talking and see what he says
dude i think that’ll be very interesting we would have a leg up on that because when we’ve lived with each other for so
long we’ve known each other for so long i think we could pull off of
our 17 years of a relationship and really sell i was going to say friendship but like a okay
friendship now that we’re not the therapist yet no but i think we definitely could uh
i think we could sell that for a while because i would just be curious i would be curious to
kind of test that um therapists savvy a little bit yeah just kind of see i feel like you and i would pull a lot
from our like our girlfriends the problems we have but no women just throw them on each other i was talking about so we’d
actually we’d act like that right and we kind of take it through it and then eventually we turn on him
let’s say we interview you no we eventually we turn on him and start questioning him and be like you know what i
how do you what makes you the expert and we start picking at him together
that was like i would hate it dude that would be a good sign she’s you know what i mean yeah i mean we
could just do like better help or something he just lets us go for hours i am by the hour by the way yeah
and i know it was three hours and 20 minutes but i’m rounding up yeah yeah he’s going to four that would actually
be [ __ ] funny i thought that would be very interesting i think we could sell it for a few sessions but i’m not going to pay for a few
sections no but i’m saying we’re going there for five minutes each time
we’re gay and then walk out literally [ __ ] that is funny oh [ __ ] i think we
could definitely do that we probably could pass it off i mean it would be a cool video to do i just
don’t well you can actually actually do a video in there that’s against their ethics well i mean it’s recording us so
that is very true or have one come in like a spy camera
like we’re [ __ ] spy kids dude oh [ __ ] all right moving on folks so
yeah let’s move into our top five um if you’ve listened to the last few episodes let’s pray
that jack and stay on topic i feel like this one is very easy too so we can’t really go off of course um the topic
today is top five candies candies and of course this is
all personal preference and to be honest this was a tough list this is a very tough list
for more than one reason and one of them being there’s so many good candies out there that and there’s so many candies that
you could and there’s so many candies that you’ve had but like after someone get tired you switch so you have another favorite and there’s so many more that
did not make my list and i made it so quickly i i definitely forgot somewhere i couldn’t really fit some in yeah so um
jack do you want to lead us off with the top five candies from um five to one so last five to one okay but all of these
are your favorites so last year yeah your top favorite i i will say the thing with candy is it’s like
it’s already marketed and known that it’s not healthy so they can put whatever the [ __ ] they want in it to make it as
delicious as possible so it does they’re all i mean
unless you get to like weird off flavors they’re all pretty much pretty [ __ ] good that’s the point of the of the
product you know but um so number five like oh well i mean it depends on your
preference but anyways go sorry yeah i mean i’m like i’m a huge like you know like say it’s
like hot tamales or something hate them because it’s just one flavor of [ __ ] anyways okay uh
number five is a tried and true thing [Laughter] that
i think came around later in the candy saga you know i mean if you if you have a timeline yeah yeah you know when candy
came out i think this is more towards you know yeah it was released earlier later uh so i’m
not an m m fan i mean it’s a good pick it’s a good pick i i i fought with that one on number five the peanut butter m
m’s that i almost put that as my number four actually that’s what i want great eminem a great eminem so i so eminem went
through this thing where you know you got your [ __ ] classic little chocolate beads then the yellow bag with
the actual peanuts and that was good i felt like dads thought it was somewhat healthy they like they’d always just eat a
[ __ ] spot they go in there and do products like oh god the peanuts yeah it’s got protein you know [ __ ] yeah [ __ ] [ __ ] or it’s got fiber or
whatever the [ __ ] peanuts have protein but um okay sorry first okay um
so i think you know peanut and i think that then they came out with like the pretzel eminem which everyone was
alright sorry i think the i think the saltiness and the crunch was just uh oh it was just a
[ __ ] wave there was a wave of emotions in my head i don’t know what to do
okay um you know it doesn’t the gr the green m m makes girls morning right
is that from the commercials no i don’t know
so green food coloring makes girls no it was just one of those old wives tales
because my uncle used to be like yeah you know i get my wife a bag of green m m’s play some dude they have a bag of just green i think he picks them out but
um and then he plays some def leppard or something and it just works yeah
yeah um but no yeah i believe the because the green eminem is is the sexy
one right i think it is yeah it’s the girl oh did you hear m m’s always great commercials though oh yeah
always great commercials very appealing very friendly that’s i like a candy with a mascot i can get behind same with cereals yeah tony the tiger i was just
gonna say who can’t sam captain crunch crunch oops oops
oh berries no um i i do want to finish it off by saying this happened like two weeks ago
there was a petition m story yeah for like the uh for the green eminem to not
have like the white stripper boots anymore she’s gotta wear like sandals or some [ __ ]
because they were too like sexy so stupid it’s an eminem dude if you think it’s sexy you have a [ __ ] issue same
people will probably watch animated porn yeah there was someone i knew in high school that was in the animated nevermind we’re
not gonna yeah i know you’re talking about oh you did yeah he’s like oh you gotta try it i’m like no thanks
yeah yeah oh thanks i’ll look at attainable things anyways go um
yeah so number five the peanut butter m m great great a newer m m product
but still i do i i love that i love that thank you thank you you’re you’re behind one of my
papers number four might be some i don’t think with you but some people just don’t get some backlash yeah some
backlash from the uh from the candy community but it’s personal preference yep uh mike and ikes
i’m a big fan dude i do i do like mike would i put it at a
number four that’s a tad high i don’t know that might be my normal mention maybe but it is it’s one of those where
it’s like i’m in the aisle of the candy i i want it dude i want those little pill-shaped [ __ ] things and you know
i want the handful and they are pretty good when you mix the flavors and you have something real special just do a whole handful in your mouth you’re like
you know yeah and it’s just getting stuck in the teeth and then you’re [ __ ] yeah yeah it’s just all about i mean it’s not a terrible pick it’s
preference preference yeah uh number three is a mounds bar no i’m kidding i was about to freak the
[ __ ] out there’s no way i don’t even know who the [ __ ] buys that i don’t know either same like paydays
i’ve never had a payday actually oh well that’s on my list i’m not even kidding is it really yeah okay how high is it
three it’s two it’s two i i’m gonna go into y okay oh my god
okay number three is because i actually um i actually had to
basically quit these um sour patch um so i haven’t relapsed in a while but
um i used to have like a five pound bag at my work and i’d eat them by the handful
sour patch watermelon no just the regular oh really well i mean i go back and forth but my favorite the watermelons are really my thing um the
problem with the watermelons is you just have one flavor but you know what with kids the flavors aren’t that good in my opinion the blues the blues
[Music] [Laughter]
he played it like it hurt and [ __ ] me man yeah yeah i
the only thing i don’t get about the harmonica is like how do you find the notes like it’s just
well it’s there’s little holes yeah i i know that combo of holes makes a certain note i know but i’m saying like like the
two on the end are very deep but together they make like an octave yeah i’m just saying like if you have a bigger mouth it might be hard to just
you know suck down on just those yeah i agree i i i i kind of gotta go yeah you pork the lips
a little bit yeah and it’s also not an instrument you share
i wouldn’t say so just an absolute [ __ ] spit pit dude yeah [ __ ] covered ground zero right
yeah jesus i mean how many people you know that are sharing her mother
oh bro you got a harmonica can i play that can i i just found it in someone’s couch
i used to have them when i was little yeah my parents got me one they got me like the little book to keep me i’m like oh i’m really into harmonica the next
week i’m like oh i want a flute now i was such a i was really i was such a verge yeah i felt like i had a harmonica
it was just always in the couch and you find it like you’re like we found it in your toy box at the bottom yeah five
years later oh there’s my phone and i go i’m gonna play this and just go back and forth like the
learning ones and it’s just a terrible quality oh
because if you had a better quality like i’m like nine would expect my parents to buy me a pure steel
like [ __ ] [ __ ] silver like just like they buy like a 500 harmonica even though they know i’m not going to like it in a month
it’s got flower stencils on them jesus christ all right uh number two is the payday um
i knew i was gonna get shifting for this one i just don’t like paydays here’s the thing peanuts man
too much peanuts what it’s caramel underneath correct yeah that’s the thing i hate caramel
then why is your number two i love a payday you love a payday but hate caramel and that’s the whole center the
whole center of it it doesn’t taste like caramel to me because the peanuts is it caramel i
that’s a good diabetics can’t eat caramel right well i think they can but it depends on
how much sugar they’ve already oh they gotta prick themselves first yeah put it in the old meter maybe yeah yeah um
anyways i think it stems from a childhood thing of where it was my mom’s favorite and because it was her candy
bar decorator like no i could never have it so like i would get in trouble if i
grabbed the pain i feel like you also could argue amongst the others that’s probably the less damaging i don’t know
i that was more of like a joke i don’t know why but every time i’m on the road if i’m like gotta deliver a bus somewhere for like five six hours really
every my breakfast breakfast and champions is yeah
a payday and eight red bulls it literally is oh my god
and i think but you hate caramel that makes no sense it just doesn’t taste like caramel to me like do you remember but you can taste the caramel in
something like if you ever if you have a drink starbucks has caramel in it even a squirt you could taste it i don’t like that caramel but this caramel
i’m just saying it isn’t okay it’s fair it’s fair [ __ ] uh and number one
i guess it’s just too much of a staple and embedded in american culture
i think i know you’re gonna say it’s the [ __ ] reese’s the rhesus it’s the racist it’s the what’s the what the rhesus
rhesus reese’s i said reese’s sounds like you’re saying my mind my dad
calls it reese’s reese’s yeah going on the google going on the interwebs anyways
um yeah the [ __ ] reese’s i mean as i said it’s kind of like you know
like alcohol is ingrained in american society yes the recess is just the reese’s is just a staple of our culture
that no matter i feel like the ceo could say the n word and we’re all still fine
well papa john said the end where we’re big buyers of papa john’s oh yeah he makes a mean pie
pie i get that what he said was wrong 100 percent in a board meeting too
yeah um as a white man there’s no time or place that is appropriate to say that
but i will say it’s kind of like michael jackson you know he probably did it
but thriller’s a damn good album you know i mean so we’re just gonna push those thoughts to the side yeah and just
enjoy whatever like the same thing like people like michael jackson vs music they know maybe he’s a weirdo but same thing we’d like papa for his pies we do
a mean pie and they give you that little thing of garlic and it’s beautiful it’s like kanye you know one of my favorite
artists do i agree with the things he says no no i don’t when he’s like i could
have killed my daughter it’s like yeah that’s what abortion is buddy like i don’t know
oh that’s a good list i like the reese’s like the reese’s pick yes okay all right see [ __ ] uh all right i had a really
hard time did you have any of the ones that i did yes i did um fighting with no only one
um fight or yeah technically one uh or technically two um i had a real hard
time fighting with this list because uh there’s so many of mine that i feel like i couldn’t make
the cut um so coming at number five in my five hole i had to go with sour patch watermelon
okay okay okay love and honestly i almost put kitkat in my number five because i always kit kat
wow what it’s five but it’s also it’s a staple it’s a very common i feel like it’s also something
that’s why it’s not the best that’s why it’s not it’s at the bottom of my list but it’s always it’s always fulfilling and it’s always a nice task like the top
off yeah well i was telling my kid but sour patch i love the little which one is
your favorite yeah sour pictures i’m saying it was between that kitkat for my five okay but i i landed on sour patch
watermelon i just love the mini watermelons i love looking at it it’s visually pleasing i
love the taste i also love watermelon flavored candy of course it’s just it’s it’s overall great treat especially in a
movie theater oh oh a movie theater you you know i don’t care even though it’s even though it’s six bucks or five bucks
it’s not even worth that but i’m gonna pay it because it’s just a great it’s great are you a fan of the watermelon trulies
they’re okay a lot of people aren’t i love them they’re not they’re i’m a big malone guy i will drink them i’m not that not that i mean they’re not great
but i’m not picky i’m not against it i’m not picky either yeah it’s like yo i’m drinking this to get absolutely [ __ ] up i don’t care what it tastes like
okay all right coming at number four this might get a backlash but i don’t care hi choose i
high choose a good one number four coming in my four baton clean up has got to be high chews high chews
are so good um and the different flavors and they’re chewy and it’s juicy
juicy juicy succulent and it’s and you can pop them out and it just gives you just
a great taste and then after you’ve had them because they have the mini packs in the actual packaging yep and so you’re
like okay moving on to the next flavor exactly and it takes you on a different adventure every time i love that so i really love high chews gotta be another
i don’t think of that one that’s a good one you could get the costco bag and it was like i never quit that far buying haiti’s wholesale
no i was like yo i didn’t go there just for the [ __ ] hike
i went to costco to get high shoes i’m like do you have to buy it wholesale i mean no it was just like you know you’re
walking through yeah and you see them and it’s a sweet treat you want to just dabble a little bit um between my three and four it was
difficult because i wanted pie cheese third but this is just a staple i mean i love the commercials i love everything
that it stands for um snickers has got to beat number three that’s a good one stickers gotta be at number three um i
don’t get it a ton but every time i have it’s great and it is fulfilling um you’re not you when you’re hungry and i love i love the
motto i love the commercials i love everything that they i will say one thing about a snickers z is that like
say i’m like actually hungry like to the bone like i’m hungry but it’s just like a gas
station that doesn’t even have like a little hot box yeah it’s like a snickers will fill you up like let me say or
it will quench that that hunger yeah it it gives you something to hold on to until you’re
ready to roll it’s the did you see they got rid of they got rid of the dick vein do you see that no it’s a that’s a myth
oh um they didn’t um here’s the thing so here’s another thing one more thing about snickers and i’ll move on to my number two
snickers for some reason in my mind it’s at number three on my list but
when i was younger and in my lunch pail sat a snickers that in my mind went the best with my
meal really it just it really complimented well like
you’re in the middle of a long day whatever just that’s that’s that’s the go-to okay so number three snickers um
this was where i really had a challenge was my two-in-one because i mean it’s the top two
i had to go i i didn’t really know what to do here because i love these two candies so much so i really i switched
both of these like four times i really didn’t know but i have to go with my gut and i have to go with what i feel or at least
currently and i have to go with rhesus at number two reese’s racist and number two i love reese’s i love reese’s i
[ __ ] love a reese’s blizzard oh and the thing i like about dairy queen had the little things
the thing about reese’s is not only is the peanut butter the chocolate on the outside oh it’s is so
[ __ ] good and it complements it so well i’m not i’m not as a big fan of the big the big cups because it’s too much
peanut butter the diff amazing the reese’s is just
it’s uncontested and when you take the when you take the little panties off you know it’s just
when you take the panties off the reese’s there’s always that that little chunk that’s left on the
right yeah you know i know it’s one guy who cuts the centers
i jumped to my truly oh my god all right number one
i mean i this could be a bias because when i was younger my mom would always get these and i just was always a sucker
it’s like an hour and now and laters or something now and lately no no it’s a charleston chew no it’s not um junior mints i got to go with juggernauts i
love junior mints um as a number one though yeah it’s wow that’s why but i
fought between these two for many moons um because i love reese’s it was my number one and every time i go dairy
queen i can’t stop getting a reese’s blizzard it’s just so oh yeah but junior mint is a number one choice that that is
shocking but i accept i but but recess in a close second and depending on the day i might choose a reese’s oh just on
its [ __ ] coattails yeah it’s really it’s really right there and close but that’s going to be it so k uh
sour patch kids sorry patch watermelon five haichu four snickers three rhesus two
i never knew you hate caramel i do i i’m still kind of confused if you hate caramel i’m i’ve wrestled with that in
my mind many of many moons but uh no i say i guess i know that there’s like designer
candies you know dove has like the [ __ ] i don’t give a [ __ ] about them you know actually
was it ghirardellis oh yeah great chocolate yeah except a lot of them have caramel or they have a filling and it’s
like just give me the [ __ ] straight up well they have milk chocolate yeah milk chocolate i’m actually i’m not a dark chocolate i love dark chocolate i’m
not it’s okay i mean i don’t want like 90 kakeo or anything but
i mean a good 70s is it called kakeo or now cacao because that’s an accent mark on
the a doesn’t it yeah which means you gotta pronounce it long is that long
wide wide don’t forget anyways
[Laughter]
yeah you are sick no this body doesn’t what are we at right now too athletic to explosive uh 45
45 wow okay well i think we’re gonna end it that’s a good episode right there that is and we were gone so we gave him
a little extra for this yeah you know a little extra bump you know for your time um well that’s gonna be it for today’s show everyone thank you for your
patience and thank you for tuning in because i know and hey listen we’re back on the horse it’s gonna be week to week we just really couldn’t do anything
about the situation we were in there um but i was in another state and then i went and then when you got and then i
was in a different state when he came back you know we’re traveling people you know we gotta go see the world yeah it ain’t all about you um but one exciting
um new development the merch is very close to being completed uh it is oh it
is no it’s drop one is completed drop one is completed um as you guys know who i’ve
listened jake taught our artist who did this amazing painting behind us moved away sadly we miss him dearly we do um
but he was unable to continue to be our merch guy so our aputure ocean’s very own jordan obaya
picked up some of that slack yes and is now doing it and honestly came up some really great things and i’m really excited about it i’m going to be getting
probably almost everything especially for the summertime and especially because it’s been so long since it came out anything new so that’s
gonna be exactly so drop one is done drop two remember so we we paid him for
both of the drops yeah but drop two is basically complete but part of it we
have to do a mini photo shoot yeah us and so when jordan is back for that and i’m very excited about drop two because
it’s going to look very yes yeah very sexy but uh yeah that will be on hclt store i’m actually gonna try to get that
done this week for drop one it’s gonna look sexy it’s gonna look good um you know so we will put on
instagram story when it’s ready yeah of course and our personals probably a lot of people say that our clothes are slimming so um in the summertime that’s
also nice um and i think really it’s a great gift for you and the entire family so yes
it’s gonna be very good um z where where can they find you
that was a good one um they can find me at um isaiah underscore lesney um james
where can they find you
yellow pages spence spencer yes uh they can find me at jack underscore spence or both of our instagrams at
around the lunch table and that’ll pretty much do it that’ll do it for um this week [ __ ] patreon oh patreon [ __ ]
if you’re even listening this long let me do this in the [ __ ] beginning damn it yeah you [ __ ] up yeah
uh patreon check out patreon.com around the launch table for episodes early-ish
and uh yeah that’s pretty much it if you want to
support yeah if you want to support it yeah exclusive connor will be coming out soon this summer we’re going to begin this summer we’ll be doing something
really really great things this summer that you want to stick around for exactly um it’s going to be something right and oh uh we are going to vegas
for my birthday june everyone mark well you’re not going to go
don’t meet us june um june 17th yes um that weekend we will be in vegas and
expect the camera we’re seeing something nice yeah we are we are um well i am i haven’t told you about looking at some
options maybe to do a mini episode in the hotel room would be pretty cool to do something like that jordan so where i
was going with that is jordan and then maybe we do like a little walk-around thing jordan is bringing his camera oh that’s perfect okay we’re gonna we’re
gonna have a little vegas uh you know we’re gonna have to make sure it’s actually it’s patreon it can be rated [ __ ] r i don’t yeah
we could be twerking on cam yeah exactly don’t dicks out [ __ ] yeah i mean yeah maybe
yeah anyways guys um thank you for your patience and we’re back on the horse we will see you next week and ps ps this is
another thing if you listen this far then you truly are a fan because i’m sure 98 of people are already probably like okay they’re over they already got
to work for our top five lists um i’m gonna say
dm either the around the lunch table page or our personals and both of our personals are on there for a top five
list that we should do next because we should take some fan um some submissions submissions yeah okay
um that’d be really cool so if you have a great thing in mind that you’d want like us to rank because i like the top five thing being able to rank things
it’s very very interesting so yes i don’t know why i looked at the camera and did this for so long like i’m [ __ ] selling them something so
technically i am oh yeah that’s something yourself catch 22. um so anyways guys thanks for listening and
we will see you next week and see ya [Music]
let’s get rowdy up in here
